Life on the Cutting Edge

Hi friends,

Lately I've found myself somewhat caught between a rock and a hard place. I'll share a wee portion of my present life with you, my blog readers, in this post. A few years ago I had my appendix removed. The doctors had thought it necessary to do the surgery as I was having severe pain in that region of my right side. After the surgery I was told that my appendix was not that bad after all. According to the surgeons they had taken it out any way as they had already done the cut. As you can imagine I was not amused but there was hardly anything to be said as the surgery had already been performed.

I was sent home on antibiotics and painkillers. Within few days however I began to experience pain and had to be admitted in a hospital near to my home. The doctors there said that I had been released too early from the other hospital and that I should not have started eating when I did. My condition improved and I was allowed to return to my home once more. Well, as far as I could see, I was none the worse for the experience except for the fact that the side of my tummy which was cut seemed to be unusually high. That's what I thought!!!

Less than a year passed and I had to be readmitted to the hospital. What was the problem? According to the doctors I had healed with adhesion that clung to my intestines and I now had intestinal obstruction. This has been one of my most horrifying experiences. Swallowing down an NG tube is a nightmare for me and having the catheter inserted is no fun either. Until I had this experience I really did not know how blessed I was to be able to perform such simple bodily functions as passing wind and defecating. I really did not dwell on the fact that the digestion of food is a great blessing. I accepted these functions as a normal part of my life and didn't even think of thanking God for making them possible. Big mistake!

Well, in the ensuing years, I continued having this problem. Each time it occurs I am unable to perform these bodily functions and since nothing can go down to be passed out, everything starts coming up and out and I have to be rushed to the hospital to have the tubes inserted all over again. Recently I have been told that I have also developed incisional hernia- which according to the doctors is contributing to the obstruction. Now I'm being told that the only way to solve these problems is to put my trust in surgeons again and return to the cutting table so that they can repair what has gone wrong. Need I say that I have lost interest in surgery?

Here I am on the cutting edge. This past week I realized that once more I seemed to be in danger of going back to the experience of swallowing the NG tube. I was having difficulty in 'passing my stool' and by Tuesday I realized that I was unable to 'pass wind' either. In spite of my plight though, I had a deep settled peace. I began talking to Jehovah Rapha, truly He is my Healer. I told Him about my health issues even though I know He knew about them from the foundations of the earth. I didn't ask Him for physical healing but I asked that He would do whatever He thought was best for me. Of course, I asked Him to prepare me for eternity- spiritual healing- that's what I crave and need so urgently.

I decided to call my mother who was at that time visiting my sister. I asked her to get me a bottle of prune juice on her way home. She was so concerned on hearing of my plight that she left immediately, bought the prune juice and hastened home. I took one long draught and wonders of wonders I was actually startled by the loud passage of wind from below. Later on I was relieved of my stool. The pains went and I was free again.

As I worshipped today (I'm a Seventh Day Adventist), I was in a deep attitude of gratitude. My God cares. I know that I'm just a pilgrim passing through this world of sorrow and woe. I know too that I'm not worthy of the least of God's blessings. But isn't it just like our Father to give us undeserved gifts? Yes, I'm on the cutting edge my friends, but I'm allowing myself to fall in the hands of my loving Father. Each day that I awake I will glory in His divine compassionate love. On the cutting edge, I thank Him for all the gifts that seem so insignificant, even my finger and toenails. How would I manage without them?

Bless the Lord, oh my soul, and all that is within me bless His Holy Name.